Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa 花樣年華


In this very chance I will talk about my infatuation, something that I hold dear, my soft spot, BTS.

It first started back in 2014, I unintentionally found them on TV, it was their Boy in Luv music video from their school trilogy album SKOOL LUV AFFAIR. Seriously it was from my only innocent curiosity, then it led me to my Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa: my Most Beautiful Moment in Life.

If one ask me why I was so into them, maybe my first answer would be because I relate to them a lot.

I had my lowest point in 2015 and BTS became something that can get me back on track. Their albums HYYH Pt. 1 and HYYH Pt. 2 motivate me the most. Their lyrics and wide range of musicality became my inspiration to learn more and to prevent you from falling you have to accelerate more and not to stop.

I can have a taste of failure and frustration and bow my head

We are still young and immature, don’t even worry about it

Moss surely grows on a stone that doesn’t roll

If you can’t return, go straight through your mistakes and forget them all

It’s not easy but engrave it onto your chest

If you feel like you’re going to crash then accelerate more, you idiot

– INTRO: Never Mind, from BTS album Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa pt. 2

My second reason would be their genuine fondness of eachother. How they interact and how their personalities match and complete every single gaps so they can work on every problems they face wisely.

I once read an interview of their producer (Bang Si Hyuk), and he literally said that they like each other to death. There would be often small arguments. However, ever since they first debuted, they were thought to solve the problems within the team even if they fought. This, the members followed 100% (source: interview by OSEN titled Oh! A cup of coffee).

I was also thankful to them because their songs really gave me so much knowledge. I learned a lot about music genres, politics, social, movies, psychology, literatures, and even biology from their lyrics.

But, if one ask me if I am ashamed to be their fan at this age… I must say… Yes, sometimes. Mostly because of a huge misconception of the word fangirl. What is in your mind when you think of fangirl? Must be a very passionate (rudely, they sometimes say hardcore) young female fan, who screams and defends their favorite band (mostly Korean) and cry over them at concert. This concept is basically generalizing, and that’s what disgusts me so much.

But let me explain you about this with what Epik High said on their interview about the label ‘fangirl’.

Epik High: Why are music fans called fangirls just because they are young girls?

“People should not curse at or belittle someone for their music tastes just because they know better,” and they wondered why young females don’t have the rights to enjoy certain types of music (I add, without being belittled). They said this especially in the case where the term ‘fangirl’ is used to belittle young females. Girls can understand music too, so music fans should not call them fangirls just because they are young girls (I add, or a female who likes to listen to Korean musics).

Epik High pointed out that the attitudes of some music enthusiasts who criticize others to show their supremacy isn’t right, nor is the clear act of male superiority to label fangirls as such. Tablo said, “The concept of an overzealous (passionate or they often say hardcore) fan culture is a problem in itself, but music fans shouldn’t dismiss young females as fangirls. We should get rid of the habit of dismissing females, and should not look down upon others just because you think you’re well versed in music. It would be great if everyone opened their hearts and listened to music comfortably and lovingly.” (Source: JoyNews24, 2006) *I personally add the crossed sentences.

Okay, so back to my original intention to write this post is to share my experience last Saturday which is MY FIRST TIME WATCHING BTS CONCERT! BIG YEAY!

I originally didn’t want to meet BTS in real life, cause BTS has been a big part of my secluded and different realm of my reality and daily life. I promised myself to not bring BTS to my real life, but what can be done? They had helped me get through all the hardest part in life. I must see them, at least once.

My opinion about the concert (beside all the shitty management the promotor did) is they performed really really well. Really well, I mean I never imagined they are that good, eventhough I watch their performances on Youtube endlessly… But to experience it in real life I could not find the perfect words to describe. It was hype, it was lit.

Their dances were on point. I was in the pit, and I could saw it clearly how they snapped powerfully and every details in their dances amazed me. Their vocals are also great… I mean with those all the dancing they did, they still can sing and rap that good..

I think it was a complete lucky choice, that I chose to watch from the pit. Because it is not that far from the stage, I can see them clearly one by one without anyone missing. And I could also see their detailed dance moves more clearly.

Last but not least, I also didn’t expect a slight change of my bias list. Basically I like every members in equal (ehm, but Yoongi a slight bit more). But yesterday… Jung Hoseok deceitfully turned it over. That rude big ball of sunshine became my second bias (nothing can top Yoongi for me) with all those sly smirks he threw at the audiences, and some hip thrusts here and there. And he is so handsome in real life I was like ??? His dances are too good, and his solo performance (for me at least) was the best compared to other members.

Sadly, eventhough WINGS is indeed a good album but HYYH series are still my favorite. So I would prefer to watch their HYYH On Stage: Epilogue concert, but what can I do? They only came to 8 countries and Indonesia was not in their list :’D


Photo by Aloysius Lim

As I am writing this, I still cannot believe that last Saturday….

I. just. watched. a. COLDPLAY. concert.


To have crossed one item off my bucket list got me like something between relieved and sad. Something like when you graduate school, a mix of proud, excited and also sad to be missing the classes, friends and the time you wasted to dream and imagining things.

Coldplay has become an essential part of my life since I was in middle school. So when I knew Coldplay would visit Singapore in their world tour, I just had to buy the ticket cause I honestly didn’t know when else will I get the chance.

And to describe Coldplay concert, it would be a great mix between music, set design, stage effects, hype performance and unexplainable emotions. Here is the setlist (only ones I can remember, because I’m suck at memorizing things):

A Head Full of Dreams, Yellow, Every Teardrop is a Waterfall, The Scientist, Paradise, Princess of China, Everglow, Clocks, Charlie Brown, Hymn for The Weekend, Fix You, Viva La Vida, Adventure of a Lifetime, Something Just Like This, Sky Full of Stars, Always in My Head, Midnight.

The fact that A Head Full of Dream became the opening song was really a genius choice! Right what we were about to receive favorably from Coldplay that night!

oh I think I landed
where there are miracles at work
when you got me open-handed
when you got me lost for words

I was SUPER HAPPY AND STARTLED when Charlie Brown and Princess of China were played. It was really unexpected! Those two are my most most favorite songs from Coldplay and to experience those two songs live on stage was really my dream. I am not lying, Charlie Brown performance was beyond magical… how the ocean of xylo bands and the lyrics were somehow a reflection….

So we’ll soar luminous and wired
We’ll be glowing in the dark.

The whole audience in the stadium were wired to eachother, coming right there with the same purpose and preference. We can just sing along to our favorite songs with some strangers, blending in one specific emotion. And that is the most addictive moment when you attend a concert.

And to inform you, I cried when Fix You was being played. And not just cried but I CRIED HARD. I had to stop moving and singing and had to cover my face because people around me staring weirdly at me. I cannot even record the performance.

That moment when Chris laid down on the stage, and he began singing the first verse… I bursted into tears. The feeling was overwhelming, I couldn’t contain myself.

But seriously anyone must said that they can deeply relate to this song. There must be a point when someone was infatuated by this song in their teenagehood.

But I still have disappointments tho… Ink, True Love, and Us Against The World were not in their setlist. I watched Mylo Xyloto Live 2012 (from youtube obviously) and I got goosebumps when they played Us Against The World. It is such a shame that I got no chance to attend my (how to say it?) fav era of Coldplay live on stage.

But the concert as a whole was PERFECT! I can’t wait for their next world tour. And maybe Coldplay Concert would not become my Once In A Lifetime item anymore ;D (I can’t complain for the second or third time).

Hip Hop: Let’s Not Take It For Granted


I am a little bit hestitant to write this kind of article cause first people will somehow find the wrongs in it and second is the last time I wrote this long was probably on my English Course exam. Lol

So what you read in here basically is pure my point of view. I was graduated from Industrial Engineering and have zero basic in music. I am just a person who grew up with music and listen to music a lot. Like seriously a lot. So I hope people can get that this is written 100% by a person who enjoys music and I am not saying I am an expert or have a great music skill.

As I said I grew up with music. Back then (when I was in elementary school) I listened to my bro’s winamp playlist which were mostly Indonesian bands, and I also enjoyed listen to traditional music (this was from my mom and dad). As I grew up, I came to like what was on trends back then, say it Westlife, Backstreet Boys, Avril Lavigne, and Britney Spears.

I listened to music a lot even when I was a toddler. So, I am not new to hip hop.

My first hip hop music was probably Bondan & Fade2Black titled Bunga, I first listened to it in 2006 I think. I got attached to the song cause it was really new to me. I didn’t know words can be delivered in such way. Nothing I had heard before. I even memorized the lyrics and the flow, my friends were amazed lol.

But seriously the lyrics were brilliant to a junior high’s first grader. I really knew nothing about music back then, so what I enjoyed the most was the lyrics. Back then I also enjoy writing so it added up my vocab and writing style.

My second hip hop music was Oka Antara ft Sabria titled So Special. This was also my first hip hop song in English that I listened to. Again the lyrics was so good, even now if I listen to this song my amazement won’t be any less. My fav would be:

Ur first thing in the morning

Got you inside me since day one

Bury me six feet deep underground

It’s crazy yeah you prolly would

Pray for your love too

If you was in my shoes


Cause I’m gon’ do the same thing

Without you I’m senseless, cause you’re my instinct

Di celah kaki hujan

Kita berdansa, bercumbu dalam asa

Rhyme, flow, and pronouncation are on point /CRI

As time goes on I came to like Eminem, Drake, Wiz Khalifa, Ty Dolla Sign, and Wale. But recently my fav would be only Korean Hip Hop because it is more vibrant and Western Hip Hop started to sound the same (basically they are either Trap or Moombathon or a fusion of the two).

Okay so the introduction turned to be real long… What I want to talk actually is about recent phenomenon, new trend, hip hop in Indonesia. Just this afternoon my workmate showed me a hip hop music video sung by Awkarin titled Bad Ass. And I was intrigued to write about this huge misunderstanding about hip hop music.

Bad Ass basically is a Trap song with a really half-assed written lyrics telling about how great she can fuck than any other girls, how she is a criminal and people shouldn’t mess with her.

Seriously…. What a messed up mind you have there

People who are not familiar with hip hop will misunderstand that it is all about guns, sexy girls, money, and DISSING. Yes rapper often relates to dissing because it is part of their culture, underground battle and freestyling. But is it what this all about?

No. Seriously it is beyond that level.

I watched a variety show called American Hustle Life with Coolio in it, and what I learned from there was: People mostly treat hip hop as a style/fad/clothes/shoes/ materialistic endeavor and emphasizing “swag lessons” instead of the political roots of hip hop culture. Coolio even showed his displeasure to a person who did gimmick about hip hop culture without knowing the real interpretation.

And to see the music video with a very minimal clothes, a super duper gangsta-like face mask, a gun mentioned in the lyrics… I was so disgusted by how much she pretends. It is in the point of me pitying her, cause of her lack of knowledge.

And what special about hip hop beside rhyming and flows are maybe is how one could be honest in their lyrics. Rappers and hip hop musicians mostly write their own lyrics, that is how they can get acceptance and acknowledgement.

So when I watched Awkarin’s music video I was wondering who produced the song and who wrote the lyrics…. It is so half-assed written and a really shallow lyrics.

Rappers I know do dissing with a very intellegent choice of words. Sometimes even use some cools symbolism that make us listeners wonder and look for what’s more behind it. Richen our knowledge not throwing it raw to our face.

I didn’t say the music is bad because it depends on one’s taste and liking. What I want to straighten is, hip hop is beyond what you see in that music video/songs or any music videos/songs with the same style cause I found much more of it (unfortunately all were created by Indonesian Rappers).

Hip Hop is not something you can use to only just gain popularity. Not something you can use to make you seems a lil bit cooler.

I suggest you all to learn more to enjoy more. Thank you.

What exactly?

I tell myself I am searching for something. But more and more, it feels like I am wandering, waiting for something to happen to me, something that will change everything, something that my whole life has been leading up to.

Khaled Hosseini, And The Mountains Echoed

So about 15 minutes ago, I decided to open my tumblr and that quote just happened to be on my dashboard. It made me freeze for some minutes, and I don’t know there was just a sudden wave of thoughts came to me all at once. I relate to those words.

You know people somehow have a close association to pretending. They keep telling themselves false things they don’t even realize. So it stays in their mind, and the lies go on. I don’t know, I always talk about passion. There are so many things I want to do in life. But you know, I have to settle down eventually. Doing something permanently and make money. So I need to figure what I want to do after I graduate.

The choices are to continue my master study or immediately working in any companies. I have been longing to study art and creative industries this past year. I have this really certain urge to study and know more about people through art. It would be so cool if I can add MA beside my B.Eng degree. I really want to take part in developing local creative industries, if I am lucky enough I would work on BekrafID.

But if I just immediately take a job, I would probably stuck in Marketing, Brand Development, or Business Development. It is not that I hate it, tho. I like the job and take a big interest in those subjects. Those are what I have been doing in my college life. But then, art would just be something that I enjoy at local exhibitions and shows on weekends. I want to experience art more, I really want.

But now, I feel like I am in limbo. I nearly do nothing to achieve either my master study or taking a job. It is like I don’t want to miss out. I don’t want to regret so I don’t freaking know what to do first. I want to continue my master study but what if I fail in getting any scholarships after months of preparation, after depending more on my parents.

It is exactly like I am wandering, waiting for something to happen to me, something that will change everything, something that my whole life has been leading up to. When I know that nothing will come to me if I don’t freakin’ do something. I need to do something.

Let me drown in my thoughts a little bit more and then freakin decide what do first.



There is so much history in my head. The people I’ve left. The ones that I’ve kept.

– Suburbia, Troye Sivan (2015)

Recently, there is an occurence that makes me want to recall this past production. So let’s go on with the introduction..

Metropole is the title of a musical theater that I became a part of. My role is an assistant director, and basically my job is to assisting and managing all the production activity start from all the practices, rehearsals, art & music production, costumes, makeup, hair do, stage, audio & lighting management until the day of the actual show.

It was probably the best experience of my life. I have been dreaming of taking part in such a big event and to be an assistant director is just combining my favorite things, all in one fun work.

Or, so I thought.

It is not all about the ‘fun work’. It is also about hard work, consistency, ups and downs, clashes inside and many more. Total of 9 months long, and all the lessons are about how you have to keep only ones who want to be kept, how to be strict not only to your coworkers but also to yourself, how to hang in there and not give up yet, how to handle things that are already chaotic, how to handle yourself, how to be kind to yourself… There are countless things I gain from this musical theater production.

And one of it is friendships.

I met so much kinds of people, with different backgrounds and mindsets. Dealing with them is not an easy job. But we worked it out and somehow they left a distinct of familiar impression to me. It was just like when you can no longer use your worn out shoes because it has reached the end of its lifetime.

Yang memisahkan kita adalah ingatan. Mari simpan rapi semua adegan di bagian paling ujung di sudut memori, dan sekali-kali kita buka untuk menertawakan betapa bodohnya kita, betapa bahagianya kita di masa itu. Terimakasih. Baik-baik kamu disana, sampai jumpa di saat rindu tiba-tiba hadir dan menolak untuk diacuhkan.

The aftermath is not that nice, tho. We still struggling to fix things up because there are some problems left. But we will get through it.

Alter Ego

An alter ego (Latin, “the other I”) is a second self, which is believe to be distinct from a person’s normal or original personality.

Every person has two sides to them. One they let the world see and one they keep to themselves. And so am I.

One fine day I will be a passionate author, I have this wild imagination I can’t wait to spill out on to papers. Then another day, I will be that indie singer who covers popular songs and post it on soundcloud. I am also a dancer, practicing in the middle of tight schedule and enjoy jamming on random hiphop musics. And so many forms of myself that I rarely expose to anyone.

To say that those are my actual alter egos are somehow unfit. I think the best way to describe is they are my high key passions. I really enjoy to experience new things, and I tend to do it passionately.

And when you find me in the middle of Borneo’s tropical rainforest carrying two baby orangutans on my both arms, please don’t be shocked. That is my alter ego to become their foster parent 😉

Fiksi: Paralel


London, 12 September 2001

Tiga hari setelah Zarah kembali dari seminggu perjalanan ke Lamayuru, Zarah memutuskan untuk tidak lagi menghabiskan awal musim gugurnya dengan patah hati. Zarah sadar dua puluh jam berada di atas tempat tidur, dan sisanya untuk makan sekedarnya dan buang air sangat-sangat tidak sehat untuk tubuh dan mentalnya. Maka dari itu, sore ini, berbekal mantel abu-abu yang Paul berikan sebagai hadiah musim dingin lalu saat pulang dari Danau Kussharo, Zarah melangkahkan kakinya di sekitar Hyde Park. Membiarkan pikirannya berkelana kemana-mana.

Di dalam semesta paralel, semesta terdekat mempengaruhi satu sama lain dengan kekuatan repulsi halus. Setiap semesta bercabang menjadi sekumpulan semesta baru. Semua kemungkinan dari sebuah kenyataan di dunia lain bisa saja terjadi. Dan apa yang terjadi pada dirinya di semesta lain pasti tidak sama. Mungkin Ia adalah seekor kecoa yang jatuh cinta pada manusia. Mungkin Ia adalah seorang peracik kopi handal yang obsesif. Dan mungkin…

Mungkinkah Ia bertemu dengan Storm di semesta lain?

Zarah sangat, sangat ingin tahu. Sangat ingin seperti itu bisa membuat sesak di dadanya terasa lebih ringan. Tetapi pertanyaan itu justru melakukan hal yang sebaliknya.

Kansei engineering for e-commerce sunglasses selection in Malaysia – Methodology

Kansei Engineering adalah suatu konsep ilmu yang membuat saya tertarik setahun belakangan, dimulai saat saya mengambil mata kuliah Makro Ergonomi. Pengertian Kansei Engineering sendiri merupakan sebuah eknologi yang menterjemahkan perasaan dan citra (image) pelanggan tentang suatu produk kedalam elemen-elemen desain.

Di dalam jurnal ini, Kansei Engineering digunakan dalam penerapan e-commerce untuk produk kacamata hitam di Malaysia. Didalam metode ini ada beberapa tahapan yang dilakukan, diantaranya adalah: Pengumpulan Kata Kansei, Menyusun skala semantic differential (SD) untuk Kata Kansei, Pengumpulan sampel, Klasifikasi item/kategori, Evaluasi percobaan, Analisis statistik, Interpretasi dari data yang telah dianalisis, dan Identifikasi elemen desain yang berpengaruh.

An Application of Data Envelopment Analysis (DEA) for ERP System Selection: Case of A Petrochemical Company – Methodology

Dalam menentukan sebuah sistem ERP yang cocok untuk suatu perusahaan, diperlukan metode-metode yang sesuai sehingga pemilihan ERP sukses dan bisa meningkatkan performa perusahaan tersebut. Di dalam jurnal ini, terdapat kasus tentang sebuah perusahaan petrochemical yang berada di Iran dan ingin menentukan sistem ERP apa yang cocok untuk diterapkan. Di dalam kasus ini, digunakanlah DEA model yang formulanya bisa dilihat sebagai berikut:

Framework 2Namun terdapat dua tahap dalam metodologi kasus ini, yang pertama adalah memodelkan masalah menggunakan DEA model, dan yang kedua adalah memprioritaskan alternatif pilihan yang ada.

Information Systems Supported Organizational Learning As a Competitive Advantage – Methodology

Selamat malam readers! Malam ini saya ingin mereview sedikit tentang jurnal yang saya baca tentang keterkaitan Management Information System dan Competitive Advantage. Ternyata di dalam pembelajaran suatu organisasi, bisa diterapkan sebuah sistem informasi yang akan menunjang competitive advantage dari suatu perusahaan. Berikut adalah framework yang digunakan di dalam jurnal tersebut. Framework ini menunjukkan bagaimana sebuah kebutuhan dari “penerima” pertama-tama diterjemahkan ke dalam suatu proses transformasi, yang pada gilirannya akan diberikan oleh konsep operasi sistem tertentu.
Framework 1